Gage is my son and is one of the most wittiest, funniest people I know. I've had many tell me they stop scrolling on Facebook when they see a #LIFEWITHGAGE moment. I'm going to post them here in my blog and if you need a good chuckle for the day, stop and read a few. Enjoy!!
Gage: Mom, did you know that 78% of stair accidents happen on the stairs?!
Me: Gage your hair looks much better since I trimmed it. It was getting kinda wild. GAGE: I know and dad was gonna make me shave it all off but I think we could showed him pictures of cool people with crazy hair. ME: I said well like Albert Einstein had that hair and he was really smart. GAGE: No mom. Cool people. Like Bob Ross. 🤣🤣🤣
Gage said Mom we doing retakes!! The guy pressed the button and gave me a 👍🏼 and said Good Job! I said dude, you didn’t even let me get comfy in your stupid stool 😂😂😂
Gage just never fails to crack me up. Even if I'm having a horrible day he's just himself. Funny. He came in the kitchen to talk to me with his xbox headset on. He said he had a friend on there he was playing with but told him to hang on he'd be right back then he muted his mic. He stood there and talked to me for a good 5 minutes then left to go back in his room. He comes back in the kitchen and says uh oh. I said what? He said I muted my mic and told him to hang on. Guess he didn't hear me cause when I got back on all I heard him say was, And that's what happened.. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Guess he missed an entire story lolol
I learned something new today from Gage. Yes Gage, my 5th grader. So apparently nowadays if a kid thinks your weak your called a pillow. 🤷🏻♀️. Had no idea. So let this be a lesson to all other parents who doesn’t know the lingo nowadays either. If your kid calls you a pillow, their calling you weak. 🤦🏻♀️😂🤔
Gage: I’m gonna be a stripper when I grow up and gonna give gluten free lap dances Me: there’s a job I’ll never visit my son at 🙄
Gage keeps wearing his old shoes and I asked him why don’t you wear your new shoes I got you: Gage: cause that annoying kid that I told you about has them. He walked up to me and said, Oh My Gosh, we have the exact same shoes. You wanna be frieeeends!!!
Gage moment: He comes home from school. Gage: Mom did you get an email about clubs at school? Me: No. was I supposed too. Did you sign up for any? Gage: yea I signed up for like 6 or 7 of them. Me: Well good. Did you get in any? Gage: None I signed up for. Me: Well what club then. Gage: I got put in the homework club 🙄 😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️ I didn’t even know there was such a club 🤣🤣🤣😂😂
Gage askes me: Mom, If it’s 0 degrees out and they say it will double that cold tomorrow then what will be the temperature tomorrow? 🤷🏻♀️
If anyone tries to text Lexi today to tell her happy bday she is grounded from her phone and won’t get it. When she got grounded her brother, Gage, says That’s real mature mom!!! 🤣🤣
Gage: omg mom! Omg mom!! Look my elbow made it in Google!!
Lady: Well hi. What's your name? Gage: Jimmy Gage gets the look of stop it! Gage: my names Gage, I'm 9, I like playing Xbox, I'm going into 4th grade and like long walks on the beach. Lady: oh well your cute. What are you doing? Gage: I have reached my destination. Why you here? Ugggg. This kid!!!
The kids dad comes to pick them up. Gage: Dad I got papers for you to sign. Dad: What do I gotta sign? Gage: Uh, you’re first and last name! 😂😂
Me: Gage where you been? Gage: At a birthday party! Me: what? Who's bday? Gage: I don't know but they had cheeseburgers and cake and everything! I think it was one of Lexi's friends cause they asked where she was and I said well this was a little unexpected. She don't feel good Lexi: Uhhh. I'm not sick!!
Gage: please let us stay home for the eclipse. It won't happen again for like 20 years and you and dad will be straight up dead then 😂😂
School has started so dinner conversation has begun. Rusty: Lexi, you know it’s only the beginning of the year and your only allowed two suspensions so you better behave this year. Gage: Yea. So spend them wisely 🤦🏻♀️
Took Gage to Dr. today. Keep in mind he's 5. She wanted to listen to him breath. Well of course he was very dramatic about it. She said hold your breath he said I can't she said yes you can and he looks at me and says...Mom, this Dr.'s trying to kill me, quack, quack, quack. Wow!!!
Me: Gage your gonna eat all the food in the house! Gage: you can just go to the bank and get more money. Me: you think anyone can just go to the bank and get money? You gotta have money in there. Gage: wait, you mean you gotta give the bank money for them to just give it back. Thats stupid!! 😂😂
ME: SO Gage, do you have a lot of friends at school your gonna miss when next year when you transfer? GAGE: WELL I only hang out with really one group there and it's not a lot. ME: Like what kind of group? Popular, sporty, smart, everybody? Who? GAGE: OH, We're nerds mom. ME: gage!!!! GAGE: We are. We're the nerds and weirdos and that's the group I like cause let's face it mom, we don't have a lot of girls hanging around our lockers or lunch tables ya know!
Gage comes home this morning. I ask him, So what did Lexi practice driving this weekend? He says, the Jeep which surprised me cause that's our main car. Me: well how'd she do? Gage: She hit 1 ditch, hit something else and almost hit gma and GPa's fence but she did good. We still have our main car with a little dirt and a small scratch 🤦🏻♀️🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 #lifewithgage Update from her dad: She didn't even drive the Jeep. Lol. She drove the car. She only hit one ditch, one field and the fence. Other that that she did great. She hit a top speed of 35
Gage comes running out of his room into the kitchen like ugggg. I said what? He said I dodgin it. I said dodging what? He said them child support cases!! 🤷🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
Sitting at Crosspoint today (don't ask) and as I'm filling out paperwork some guy yells across the room, " Hey, your a lefty! Yeah!!!". I said "Yup, I'm in my right mind!". 🤔🤦 Didn't think about where I was before I said that one! 😐
Mom, I broke up with my girlfriend today. ME: Ya did? Gage: Yeah. She was in a wheelchair and I took it. ME: OK? Gage: Yeah, but guess who came crawling back. 😐😐😐😐🤦🏻♀️